Be The Example

Back in May I was asked to speak at a local event called Tables of Love.  Besides speaking at my own church and once at a school FCA, this was something new to me.  I wasn't 100% sure what I needed to speak on even up until the night before the event.  I tried coming up with creative titles to different speeches, but God kept tugging at me to go back to some scripture and study notes I had already read over.  I didn't think the topic of "Parenting" would really make an effective speech, but it was something that had been on my heart for a few months.  When I got in front of the ladies that morning, I told them that I didn't trust my own words, so most of what is in this speech is straight scripture and some study notes from the HCSB Study Bible for Women.

*Please keep in mind that I am not a parent myself and am no expert when it comes to parenting.*

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In Deuteronomy chapter 4, Moses is calling the Israelites to live a life of obedience. This is taking place after Moses came down from the mountain with the two tablets and saw the Israelites worshipping a golden calf--even after everything the Lord had done for them.

"Only be on your guard and diligently watch yourselves, so that you don't forget the things your eyes have seen and so that they don't slip from your mind as long as you live. Teach them to your children and your grandchildren."
Deuteronomy 4:9

The Responsibility of Parenthood

Over and over again the book of Deuteronomy emphasizes the importance of listening to and obeying the Lord, and Moses linked this to the responsibility of parenting. Not only were the adults to listen to and obey the Lord, but they were to teach their children how to listen to and walk with God. Your actions today affect those who come after you. Do you live in a way that will bless those who come after you? Are you listening and making choices that are in accord with the commandments and statutes of God? Are you allowing your children to see you respond to the Lord in your daily life? Are you teaching your children to know God and obey him? Moses was not asked to be the primary teacher to all the children; parents were given that responsibility. In the same way, even though pastors, teachers, and church leaders will play a role in the spiritual development of children, parents have the primary responsibility of passing down spiritual truths to their children. (HCSB Study Bible for Women)

"Listen, Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is One. Love the lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the door posts of your house and on your gates." Deuteronomy 6:4-9

God instructed Moses not merely to tell the people what he said but to train people how to follow his command. Parents are responsible for the spiritual training of their children, a process that involves both verbal instruction and modeling obedience. (HCSB Study Bible for Women) Some parents live by the rule: Do what I say not what I do. The reality is, your kids are watching you. They are listening to you. What kind of example are you providing for them?

You might be asking "When do I have the time?" Even if you don't have time for anything else, make time for God, especially when it comes to setting the example for your children. Here's how:

Morning Time

When I graduated high school my mom had several close family and friends write letters to me.  One specific part of a letter that I remember is from my Aunt's letter.  It said something along the lines of: "Before you put on your shoes and begin your day, spend time in God's Word and pray."  (I know that's probably not how it goes at all, but that's just what I remember about it.)  I know some of my least stressful days are started in conversation with God and giving Him control of the day.

Travel Time

A friend of mine told me that she and her daughter have  a prayer time on their travel to school in the morning.  This could fall under the morning time category as well.  Be creative with your time together in the car whether it's a short trip or traveling on vacation.

Family Time

I had a conversation with a parent of a youth once.  We talked about the Essential Connections that the youth get each month that has daily devotions in it.  The parent mentioned how it would be good to do the daily devotions together as a family in order to hold everyone accountable for their time spent in scripture.

Bedtime

No story to share here.  I would just encourage you spend time reflecting on the day with your child and end the day in prayer just as you began the day.

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It is important to remember that even if you don't have children of your own, you can still be an example to the children and youth around you. You never know who is watching your actions or listening to your words. Let their eyes and ears be filled with God and His instructions for our lives. My parents encouraged me to go to church, but I also had family members and people in the church who followed up that encouragement. 

Teach a youth about the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.

Proverbs 22:6

"I do my best and God will do the rest." -Cecil Motley

Youth and children: You have a role too! 

Children, obey yours parents as you would the Lord, because this is right.

Ephesians 6:1

Paul first commands children to obey their parents because it is the right thing to do. A child's obedience to his parents is a reflection of his or her 

obedience to the Lord. (HCSB Study Bible for Women)

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Colossians 3:20

Jesus told his disciples that if they loved Him they should obey his commandments. In the same way, children must show their love for their parents by obeying them. (HCSB Study Bible for Women)

I hope this provides encouragement for you when it comes to your children. Maybe it gives you an idea on how to be involved with the children/youth at your church or community. Whatever the case, be the example they need when it comes to their relationship with God.

In Christ,

Katie Castaneda